Monday, August 20, 2018

What Happened and What's Going On....

Hey! How are ya? Long time no talk (and other social niceties).

The truth is that I'm not doing so well. To say it's been a rough year is a bit of an understatement.
So if you feel like reading about a series of unfortunate events (not a book review) then read on as I take you down an introspect into my 2018.

It started out just like any other January. Working my butt off at my ultra exciting Phlebotomist job. I really can't complain. The patients are great, the danger pay is even greater and it seems to be something I'm extremely good at having only missed veins on a handful of patients since starting there. Until working three doubles in a row caused me to have TREMENDOUS pain in my knee. I immediately call for a doctor's appointment with the GP. He assesses, does x-rays, writes me off work and doing literally anything with my knee, figures it's a meniscus issue but, given my history, sends for a Rheumatology consult anyway. I wait a painstaking two months to see the Rheumatologist who proceeds to order an MRI, which (shocker!) shows non-specific inflammation. Long story short, I'm passed on to several other specialists who aren't even worth mentioning but ultimately I end up at a Sports Medicine Doc. Pallofemoral Pain Syndrome is the diagnosis. Orthotics, physical therapy and a specialized brace are the answer. About $1000 in uncovered medical costs and it's as good as it's gonna get.

March 27th, 11:43pm - A knock at the door. It's a police officer. He asks for my sister. My sister is 6 hours away at school. Actually he just wants to let her know her dad has died, they found her name in his apartment. She's my sister. Her dad is my dad.
My dad is dead.
Enter the whirlwind of telling my grandparents their eldest son is gone, funeral home consultations, emptying of his apartment, returning of the empties, sifting through the mountains of unpaid loans, returning the previously repossessed car, dealing with the family members who refuse to see the truth....
My father was an uncontrolled diabetic who had high cholesterol, high blood pressure and drank like it was 1920's prohibition era and he was the sole provider of bathtub gin. Needless to say, we weren't close. I lost my father when I was 12 years-old and he decided to move out of my house and leave my mother, my sister and me. I've been grieving for the father I had when I was young for 16 years. He was a very troubled man and I will spend the rest of my life balancing on a tightrope of missing him and trying not to be like him. I wish some others could see the truth.

I'm currently off on stress/sick/dealing with the mess my father left me leave. I'm hoping to be more active and write more on here about the other things I have been experiencing health wise as of late.

So that's my year in a nutshell. How's yours been?


Keep Smiling :)
- Kylee.

Thursday, June 22, 2017

5....

125 Dunlop Street
5th period French
Level 5 Cahier
75% in the class

Row/Team 5 in Literature
5 books read
85% of your final mark
5 journals filled

55 minute lunches on the caf floor
5 laughs a day
5 games of cards
5 won

5 years knowing you
5 days before I knew you were gone
5 sobs from your mom when she told me

5 years without you
It feels more like 500

I miss you Bubba.
I love you.


Friday, August 22, 2014

Your Normal Becomes Your New Normal....

"Yes your life is going to be different but it would have been different if you were born in a different country or if you had a different skin colour or if you had another zero on the end of your bank account.
But people don't dwell on these things because it's their normal."

I believe Hank Green is my spirit animal.
Definitely worth a watch

Living with a Chronic Disease: http://youtu.be/rr8wIiypS_g

Keep smiling
And fighting the good fight.
:)

Sunday, June 22, 2014

It All Changes and It All Stays the Same....

Two years ago today my world came crashing down around me. My best friend was gone, had been ripped from her newly thriving life. She was studying to become a Family and Youth Social Worker to help those who could not help themselves, much like she herself had been before she saught help mid-way through our 12th school year. I will never forget the day she told me "all of everything" as she put it.

August, 15th/2008.

I thought she was the most courageous soul ever to walk this planet. And I still do. She read me journal posts and we talked into the wee hours of the morning. I will not divulge any of the things she told me that night. These secrets will go to the grave with me as they did her.

I will also never forget the day I got the call.

June, 23rd/2012

Aly, my Aly, was gone. She would never recieve her degree. She would never call me with her "Guess what?!?!" coming before her hello, or before she even knew it was me. And she would never send me an email with that stupid little snail following her signature that I never really fully understood though she explained it so many times. Oh God I miss that little guy.

Now to the title of this post. It all changes and it all stays the same. Since my friend has been gone here are some major milestones I have encountered.
-I have quit my daycare job.
-I went back to school.
-I obtained my diploma with Honours and am now a full fledged Medical Laboratory Technician/Phlebotomist.
-I found out four days ago that I am hired on as a Phlebotomist at a major local hospital.

And who do I want to tell more than anyone? Someone I can't. The guilt has slowly started to creep back in. Both that I have done all of this went she can't and that it took her death to push me out of my comfort zone.

I speak to you directly now my Bubba. I am sorry and I am thankful and I am happy and I am sad and I am mourning and I am hopeful. I know that you know where all of these lie in my head and my heart at this very moment. Keep on doing what you do. I love you.

http://youtu.be/nkqVm5aiC28

Wednesday, April 16, 2014

It All Changes Tomorrow....

....hopefully....

Keep Smiling
        Wishing
        Hoping
        Praying
        And crossing everything you've got!!

Friday, February 21, 2014

A Fitting End....

.... to a very trying week.

Tuesday, February 4, 2014

The Universe Always Listens....


Keep smiling.
And believing
:D

Monday, February 3, 2014

Tomorrow, I Can Feel It....

Tomorrow is the day.
Although I thought today was the day.
But tomorrow feels special.
We shall see.

Keep smiling, hoping, and dreaming.
:)

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Caterpillars to Butterflies....

No truer words have ever been spoken,
For today I become a butterfly.

Keep smiling,
Fly high and beautifully my friends.
:)

Friday, January 24, 2014

Day 35 On The Alien Planet....

....and I'm not sure what to do with myself.
The job hunt has been less than prosperous and sitting in my living room is getting boring. There is only so much Price Is Right and Dr. Phil you can watch in a day without going a little stir crazy.
I have one prospect for a job that hopefully I have an edge up on. Still it's tough when you have so many people in your class that did so well.
I have faith that I will be hired soon.
Until then....

Keep Smiling!
(And applying!)
:)